Banned Members talking trash

Anonymous

Habitué
Joined
Jan 6, 2004
Messages
1,319
I dont know if any of you have experienced this before, but my forum has its fair share of members who have been banned. Some of these banned members have gone their ways to express their hate for our forum, by making their own community, and joining other similar communities to talk trash about us, and perhaps how they were unfairly banned even though the rules they broke gave them every reason to be banned.

At my forum I give the members many chances, as we give them friendly warnings at first, then a formal warning, then we elevate from there.

Most of the time they make posts in communities which are larger than mine, and eventually win the opinion of their people, and making the concept of posting in other forums to attract members not work very well.

My forum is fairly large, and has its share of regular members who post regularly. I'm just afraid that its a small group of people going around spreading lies about us and ruining the site's reputation.

The communities that the banned members make however, don't seem to go very well anyway, since most drop dead within a few weeks, but I would like your opinions on this, and what can be done to help this problem.

Thanks!
 

Noles

paypal+
Joined
Nov 14, 2008
Messages
3,928
To help what problem? Them going off and doing their own thing? I don't think you could... it's their choice and to be honest I'd really rather have them somewhere else anyway (regardless of their discussion topics).

I've had my fair share of complaints. Actually, almost anyone I banned complained, but that was standard. One member was a bit worse than the rest: He demanded to be unbanned "or else". Well, I had to get my phone number changed after he found it out and nonstop called my house.

You're not going to get a good reaction from members once they are removed from somewhere where they more or less enjoy being, and that's just that. Giving many chances and opportunity for change is great, but don't feel like you are obligated to or should feel you need to do even more once they are gone. It is unfortunate when you've got the bad apples that disgrace the forum they were once apart of, but it's something I have gotten more than used to and came to accept.

If you gave "many chances, as we give them friendly warnings at first, then a formal warning", that's all I would consider appropriate action.
 

cpvr

Tazmanian Master
Joined
Sep 17, 2005
Messages
8,246
Publicity is publicity. You never win the hearts of everyone. If you ban them for a good reason, then let them flock to another site - you can't stop them. I understand its a huge burden to you that they're talking trash, but this is the internet, you can't stop them from talking trash.

I've had my fair share of complaints. Actually, almost anyone I banned complained, but that was standard. One member was a bit worse than the rest: He demanded to be unbanned "or else". Well, I had to get my phone number changed after he found it out and nonstop called my house.
How did he find out your number?

If you gave "many chances, as we give them friendly warnings at first, then a formal warning", that's all I would consider appropriate action.
Exactly. Friendly warnings first, then the last and final warning, then ban.
 

Rockatteer

Devotee
Joined
Apr 4, 2007
Messages
2,706
there's not much you can do about it really. As you pointed out their forums built on hatred soon die out, which shows they really have no idea about things.

All you can really do is ignore them and keep making your forum better. However, if you are regularly having this happen, you might want to revisit your rules and make sure they are all fair and see what it is that so many members feel hard done by.
 

MisterPersonality

Shut up and run!
Joined
Nov 29, 2008
Messages
2,898
Not only does it ruin your forum's reputation, but ruins the other forum's reputation. What decent administrator allows the critique of another forum on their board? That sure shows a lot of professionalism.

But, you can't please everybody. All you can do if be the bigger guy and not stoop to their levels.
 

Noles

paypal+
Joined
Nov 14, 2008
Messages
3,928
How did he find out your number?
Fairly easily actually, just looking up a whois on my site and unfortunately I did not think of changing my real information (he also posted all of my available information on malicious websites so anyone could view it). I guess I could of been smarter about it, but that forum had many smart and resourceful people that unfortunately just could not stand not getting their way.
 

ChopSuey

Fan
Joined
Oct 8, 2009
Messages
586
Who cares what they say some may be true OR some will be just information that they get people to understand.
Talk trash about my site i could care less, cause your a problem that has been solved.
 

major

Participant
Joined
Nov 15, 2008
Messages
93
i am having a similar problem in as much as a moderator who resigned is now starting to post inflammatry posts aimed at winding me up. i have so far resisted the urge to ban him and show him up for what he is (an idiot) but for how much longer i do not know.
 

Feenix

Participant
Joined
Apr 11, 2007
Messages
64
Major, do you have anything about disruptive behavior in your ToS? If so, tell your former mod that while they are welcome to stick around the forums, they are still expected to behave themselves. If they don't stop trying to bait you, deal with them as you would any other troublemaker.
 

cpvr

Tazmanian Master
Joined
Sep 17, 2005
Messages
8,246
Fairly easily actually, just looking up a whois on my site and unfortunately I did not think of changing my real information (he also posted all of my available information on malicious websites so anyone could view it). I guess I could of been smarter about it, but that forum had many smart and resourceful people that unfortunately just could not stand not getting their way.
Ahh. I see. Have you had any problems like this since then?
 

Noles

paypal+
Joined
Nov 14, 2008
Messages
3,928
Ahh. I see. Have you had any problems like this since then?
Nope I just changed all the information to random stuff, and obviously I didn't make the mistake of putting my real number down again.
 

Alex.

The Ancient Dragon
Joined
Jul 1, 2007
Messages
11,578
Yeah, if I were you, I would change it back to the real informations and then get whois protection. If a registrar finds out it's fake information, they suspend the account and domain, but most suspend the domain.

OP, do this.

Get your left hand out, palm parallel to the ceiling. Now run the nail of your index finger in a straight light across your palm, then imagine you've built a construction fence.

Now, do the same thing, except this time, use the finger tip of your other hand's index finger, and make a rectangle shape on your palm.


The first wall represents the lies made about your forum. Sure it protects those banned users for a while, but after the dust settles and time passes on, people will be able to think clearly, and realize what the were told by those people, really doesn't make any logical sense. They dismiss what "evidence" or lack thereof, and go back to your forum.

The second example displays that while all of #1 is going on, you're still continuing the flow of your community's growth as you were prior to all this chaos starting. You've built a larger defensive wall that is thicker and can stand the test of time.

In essence, there isn't much you can do, except wait it out. Troublemakers are like children who are on a candy high and are the type who aren't very disciplined to start out with. After a while, they tire out, and put the charades to rest.
 

Rockatteer

Devotee
Joined
Apr 4, 2007
Messages
2,706
Get your left hand out, palm parallel to the ceiling. Now run the nail of your index finger in a straight light across your palm...

Now, do the same thing, except this time, use the finger tip of your other hand's index finger,
What the hell??

Santa's been hitting the eggnog again! :bonk:
 

Alex.

The Ancient Dragon
Joined
Jul 1, 2007
Messages
11,578
Nah. It's a trick I picked up a long time ago. The sensory nerves in your hand sometimes help a person understand something better than words and or instruction. Hence why some people learn new things by actually doing it and not reading it out of a book.
 

bairy

Adherent
Joined
Nov 6, 2005
Messages
386
My view...

Hot headed person A gets banned from your board, rightly or wrongly.

Person A tells person B how they were banned and it was obviously unfair.
The reason they do that isn't specifically to slander you, it's because they want to cause you some of the pain and inconvnience you're causing them, and generally they'll go to people who will believe them without questioning. They convince themselves they are in the right and they need people to back up their opinion. Slandering you, or trying to get people to leave your board, is sometimes what they want, but it isn't their primary aim.

Person B does one of three things:
1. Accepts it, starts calling you a bastard. Sometimes they'll even seek you out and hurl abuse at you based on the one side they've been told.
2. Shrug it off. "Doesn't affect me, don't care" attitude. This generally happens if person B is also a poster on your board, and doesn't want to be inconvenienced based on one side.
3. Question person A or question you to get the other side.

I've had all 3 on my boards.
I've had people throw abuse at me and leave in a huge hissy fit without asking my side. I don't really mind, if they want to form judgements based on one argument then it'll be unfortunate that they're leaving but I won't cry over it.
I've had people just quietly tut but not get involved. Just sitting on the fence. I like those. And usually they'll see other judgements you've made later on and see you're actually quite fair.
And I've had people say to me "woah, what's going on here" and once I've explained they've understood my point even if they don't agree with the decision.


You can't stop trash talk, and yes there is a risk you'll lose members. You just have to stick to your guns and keep cool. If you want to make a board post explaining the situation then that's okay, but don't do it out of panic.
The reactionary members will leave but IMPersonalO that's not a great loss (depending on if you want quality or quantity that is). The best members will either sit on the fence or ask you your side and those members I really like to keep.

And the one thing to remember the most is that if someone who geniunly did something wrong makes such a big deal from the ban on your board, then they will likely do exactly the same on whichever board they end up on which:
a) gives you more credibility and makes them look stupid and
b) they're someone else's problem now
 

Rockatteer

Devotee
Joined
Apr 4, 2007
Messages
2,706
Nah. It's a trick I picked up a long time ago. The sensory nerves in your hand sometimes help a person understand something better than words and or instruction. Hence why some people learn new things by actually doing it and not reading it out of a book.
I was referring more to the fact that the instructions don't make sense.
 

Dr3am1ng

Aspirant
Joined
Dec 20, 2009
Messages
21
Anonymous give me more detail, and i may have a rather "Revengeful" way of getting rid of people, who seem to like coming back on your forums.

On my forums i had whois protection, And i only gave powers to people i trust, but that's a different story.

If they are relentless in coming back just to spite you and your community, then i say hit them back harder. The only way people learn sometimes is by having a taste of there own sickness and therefore "medicine".

But the idea is not to be childish about it, but clever. Overall you don't need to worry about pathetic flamers who are determine to ruin your community. Half the it's all speech and no action anyway.

There is an incredibly good way to get rid of people like the people you are explaining. But if they arn't all speech and they actually are creating/joining other communities to attempt to ruin your forums, then drop me a private message. And we shall see if they still come back. :)
 

lllAE86lll

Computer Technician
Joined
Jun 13, 2007
Messages
193
there's not much you can do about it really. As you pointed out their forums built on hatred soon die out, which shows they really have no idea about things.

All you can really do is ignore them and keep making your forum better. However, if you are regularly having this happen, you might want to revisit your rules and make sure they are all fair and see what it is that so many members feel hard done by.
Yeah there isnt anything you can do. Just ignore them, they are banned for doing a such thing that is not allowed. People who get ban from something will always complain and act innocent.
 

TheHatTipper

Neophyte
Joined
Jan 3, 2010
Messages
9
I banned someone on my forum because he had a bad reputation, took the job as staff not so seriously, and he persistently harassed members on another forum. I sent him a forum email regarding his banning, and banned him.

He began to talk bad about us until his forum was bought because the domain was about to expire. Can you say "Karma"?
 

bozonessinc

Aspirant
Joined
Jan 2, 2010
Messages
41
Banning users? If there talking trash after.. Depends on the case..

Like with DP, everyone has a right to talk trash.. If you have a valid reason (which dp never has) then they shouldn't talk trash.
 
Top