10 rules for being a bad moderator

GIO

Participant
Joined
Oct 27, 2004
Messages
80
This was a great post. I can't wait to post it in my moderators forum...Thanks for that laugh.
 

all4one

Aspirant
Joined
Oct 8, 2004
Messages
27
hey, what about something for users? don't they deserve some funny rules like the mods do?
 

twister17e

Adherent
Joined
Feb 10, 2005
Messages
341
For users, how about something like...




  1. Under NO circumstances use the search function. Everybody loves to see the same message posted 7,000 times. Can you say high post-count?
  2. Post all your private information in plain view for everybody across the globe to view. We all LOVE to receive spam, and have our identities stolen.
  3. The user's responsibility on the forum is not to post or be active, but instead to drive all the Administors out of their minds. Yes, Administors love to be followed and receive private messages/emails about what website your visiting now, what your reading, etc.
  4. The rules were put into place to be broken. One of the best games to play, is to stay just "inside" of the rules so that you can not be banned.
  5. Other members love watching your animated signature that takes up the entire screen's view. The posts, articles, and other features aren't all that intresting , but a animated signature the size of the screen sure is.
  6. Forums are supposed to be like instant messengers, IRC, or similar. So, if somebody doesn't reply within five seconds it's time to bump the post with another post.
  7. Why reply to another topic when you can start a brand new fresh one. Moderators and Administors love to play a guessing game on which post that message is supposed to belong to.
  8. Never ever use English when posting! People love seeing misspelled words, no paragraphs (just one big blob of text), and in general not being able to understand what the heck your saying (like they are probably thinking right now ;)). Remember, the more readable your message is the less people will actually read it. Remember, [font=Trebuchet MS, arial, helvetica, sans-serif]! [/font][font=Trebuchet MS, arial, helvetica, sans-serif]g0t m4d sk1llz, f00.[/font]
  9. [font=Trebuchet MS, arial, helvetica, sans-serif]Private messages are worthless since they aren't private! The administators and government officials have nothing better to do then take a Sunday stroll through the database. Instead of sending private messages, just send your message to the other user via a normal typical thread.[/font]
  10. [font=Trebuchet MS, arial, helvetica, sans-serif]Everybody in the world wants to be hijacked. So, spread the love! Whenever, a user posts a question just randomly reply with another question(s) that is totally unrelated to the orginal question. Then followup that user everywhere they go asking even more questions.
    [/font]
 

texan43

Neophyte
Joined
Aug 30, 2004
Messages
6
Those were great Bobby. I especially liked No. 5! (Other members love watching your animated signature that takes up the entire screen's view. The posts, articles, and other features aren't all that interesting , but an animated signature the size of the screen sure is.)
:unhunh:
 

blootix

Gamer
Joined
Feb 28, 2005
Messages
138
Something to add to the list:

11. NEVER CHECK THE STAFF FORUM. There's a plague there! DON'T CHECK IT.
 

mdodge

Computer Technician
Joined
Apr 2, 2005
Messages
132
That is great info. We have staff rules already in place, but this adds something extra to help them realize their role. Thank you.
 

WebForging

WebForging.com
Joined
Apr 2, 2005
Messages
260
Thanks for sharing, and for allowing us to share in turn.

Regards,
Keith
 

DJ_Zach

Registered User
Joined
Apr 7, 2005
Messages
128
Kentaurus said:
Far from being a set of rules these are some guidelines that I wrote about "how to be a bad moderator", they don't cover every topic and is only an approach of what not-to-do.

I give them to my moderators. Some of them told me "wow, I never though about that" or "well.. most of them are obvious". Sometimes it is easier to think about what we don't like
  1. Don't visit the forums you are moderating often. Twice a month is enough. Nobody cares.
  2. Don't start new threads at your forum. That's the users' responsibility. You are only there for editing and deleting threads.
  3. Argue with users as much as you can. You don't have anything to loose since you are the moderator. Never bring personal matters to private messages. And remember that your opinion is the only one that counts.
  4. Don't respect the other members, make fun of them. If they make spelling errors then criticize them, if they have a poor or unargumented opinion destroy them with words. If they ask for help about using the forum don't help them.
  5. If nobody answers a thread don't answer yourself, the user didn't wanted an answer anyway.
  6. If a user makes a dupe thread in the forum don't be nice, it's the users’ fault not to know the 40+ pages that the forum has in search of a similar thread. And never ever give him a link to the content he is searching for.
  7. Don't edit the bad words in posts. Fights are fun!
  8. If a user is misbehaving ban him immediately, don't try sending him a private message or a warning, it's useless.
  9. Close all the threads you want. Users love to see closed threads.
  10. A way to be cool is to talk about the private forum threads in the public forum. Administrators love the fact that you tell all the users about the content of the private threads.
Feel free to comment on them or add any that I am missing. Remember that the purpose is to be a really bad moderator ;)
That's kind of like reverse physcology. I like that approach to explaining things to your mods; very unique. My compliments. :blueyup:
 

MarcoH64

Aspirant
Joined
Apr 14, 2005
Messages
22
11. If you are tricked into a real discussion based on arguments with members,and they are about to win, edit their post ASAP to make them look stupid.
 

dmadray

Aspirant
Joined
Apr 16, 2005
Messages
10
Thanks alot. Definitely shared this with Mods...Hope they feel guitly. LOL. THanks.
 

martz61

Aspirant
Joined
Aug 14, 2005
Messages
10
could someone circulate these to the watson at bootleg.org as theyare very good. canone translate them into the celtic(thats'kelltick') dialect for them though?
 

Sunny

Enthusiast
Joined
Jun 13, 2005
Messages
206
Feel free to ban anyone whos opinion is different to yours (a huge problem I have)
 

GT2.0

Adherent
Joined
Aug 1, 2005
Messages
252
For the 'mods'

Take over 6 months off from being a mod, hell don’t even log in or answer any emails, And only when you are removed from ‘power’ do you show up and let all the members know just how much of a ******* the admin really is. Also NEVER EVER let it go until your banned.


One more,

Don’t ever do any of the work yourself! Hell no, that’s for the admin to do on his own… after all he is the admin and he owns the board. no, you only show up when things are going well so you look good to everyone and they thank only you for all your 'hard' work and you take the credit.
 
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Sumana

Participant
Joined
Aug 6, 2005
Messages
62
Oh and not forgetting deleting posts and threads coz you just feel like it.

A problem I have!
 

shaon

Where is the God?
Joined
Jul 30, 2005
Messages
477
blootix said:
Something to add to the list:

11. NEVER CHECK THE STAFF FORUM. There's a plague there! DON'T CHECK IT.

I am adding it to my mod forum right now :jiggy:
 

Bigguy

W.U.B Owner
Joined
Sep 25, 2005
Messages
611
Those rules for the users are really good I had to post them for my members to see. Not to sure if I should post the Moderator rules, has anyone had a moderator get offended by these rules ?
 
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