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Old 07-16-2009, 02:39 PM
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Default Moderator Dillema - Should I Fire Him?
I have two forums and different moderators on both. A moderator on one of my forums has joined my second forum as a different username and he is causing a bit of drama. He's even private messaging me saying he doesn't approve of how the moderators of the second forum are running things. He doesn't know that I know he's the same user on both forums. The IP addresses and times match perfectly so I know it is him.

He's extremely helpful on the forum which he moderates and is acting over there like everything is honky dory. Other moderators and a couple members on the second forum are pretty aware that he is the same person.

So, what would you do? Would you:

1) Tell him you caught what he's doing, don't approve and ask him to resign? Loosing a great moderator on the first forum and causing a huge stir / drama in the community.
2) Pretend that everything is okey dokey and like you don't know they are the same person?
3) Tell him you know what is up and make him apologize and keep him as a moderator

What do you think? Thanks in advance for any tips.
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Old 07-16-2009, 05:38 PM
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If he has been a long serving, quality moderator on the first forum, and you know him to be mature, I would approach him (in private) about the second forum- saying you know it is him, and giving him two options. Either he changes the way he is acting on the second forum and apologises to the people he has offended, or he resigns his position as a moderator. Explain to him that even though he is not a moderator, he sets an example.

The one thing you mustn't do is let him get away with it

Hope that's easy enough to read. I'm tired and have to be awake in less than 7 hours lol.
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Old 07-16-2009, 06:15 PM
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Quote:
1) Tell him you caught what he's doing, don't approve and ask him to resign? Loosing a great moderator on the first forum and causing a huge stir / drama in the community.
2) Pretend that everything is okey dokey and like you don't know they are the same person?
3) Tell him you know what is up and make him apologize and keep him as a moderator
Put him in line and show him who's boss.
One of my moderators picked a fight with one of our members and he kept it going. I sent him the following pm.
"How are you doing? Look, I saw what you did when user here and quite frankly; you were in the wrong. You don't pick fights with members. You stop them. Next time you do this, you'll be out the door."
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Old 07-16-2009, 06:50 PM
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Does this mod have any valid points or is he just being an ass in the second forum?

If he's just being an ass I would PM him (on the first forum) and tell him I know it's him and he needs to stop being an ass.

But make sure he hasn't actually picked up on something wrong in your second forum. remember he is an experienced moderator on your first forum.. He may see a problem which you've missed.
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Old 07-16-2009, 06:56 PM
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There are some valid questions, but here's the killer. He private messaged me 5 times on the other forum pretending to be someone else and complaining about the other moderators. More than anything I feel betrayed and that this moderator is sneaky.

I've got about 10 other moderators and none of them would do anything remotely close to this. I've very open to criticism and feedback and can't believe a moderator (who we all feel is part of our family) would do something so sneaky.

My other problem is that the other moderators are getting word of what is going on and feel it is totally inappropriate behavior and think that moderator should step down.
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Old 07-16-2009, 07:56 PM
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Why not just confront him and say "Hey, you know if you had a problem with how things were running on my other site, you don't have to hide behind a made up personality. I accept criticism and I wouldn't turn you away if you said something."
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Old 07-16-2009, 09:07 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cipher View Post
Why not just confront him and say "Hey, you know if you had a problem with how things were running on my other site, you don't have to hide behind a made up personality. I accept criticism and I wouldn't turn you away if you said something."
this sounds like great advice, find out exactly whats going on for him to behave like this, you might get an explanation that makes sense.
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Old 07-17-2009, 06:34 AM
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Default moderator dilema
If it was me i would pm him and just say it straight why are you doing this and if you did not get a good enough reason fire him.
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  #9  
Old 07-17-2009, 03:47 PM
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It sounds to me like he is toying with you, I'd get rid of him fast, count your losses and be done, that is not a very trustworthy person regardless of how "good" a moderator he may be on one forum.
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Old 07-18-2009, 06:04 AM
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I would leave him on your first forum, but speak to him about the second.

If he has suggestions, listen to them, ask him how he would change the forum etc, but remind him who's boss.
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Old 07-18-2009, 01:10 PM
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I think he's just having some silly fun. I wouldn't go as far as to fire him. Definitely contact him, however, and make it clear that you won't put up with it.
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Old 07-18-2009, 06:01 PM
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I agree with Cipher here.

Just confront him and say like, " Hey look, why are you hiding behind an alternate personality? If you have a problem with something on the other forum, let me know "
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Old 07-19-2009, 07:32 PM
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Thanks for all the feedback. I sent an email to him basically saying that I know it is him and that I was shocked he'd pretend to be someone differnet to other moderators and to me and perpatuate a lie. I said I work hard to be open to any feedaback and always listen to my moderators.

The reply wasn't what I expected: He basically said I should treat him as any other member of that other forum... which I think is ridiculous since he is a moderator and in a position of example and leadership on the other community (where many of the members are the same).

I'm still stuck between keeping him on the forum where he is very helpful or nipping this in the bud and being done with him.
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Old 07-19-2009, 10:14 PM
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The question is how can you trust him now that you know he's capable of being this deceitful.

Did he give nay indication as to why he tried to hide his identity?

Last edited by Rockatteer; 07-19-2009 at 10:24 PM..
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Old 07-19-2009, 11:53 PM
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Well, he and I had a bunch of back and forth emails. Basically he doesn't think he did anything wrong and didn't lie to me. In my opinion a lie is when someone intentionally tries to deceive, especially with untruthful statements... which is exactly what happened here.

He didn't like the other mods I picked and was mad that I never gave him a full reason on why I chose them (which I did, he just didn't agree).

I was REALLY hoping he'd see that I was bothered and apologize so we could work it out. Instead he told me that I shouldn't be hassling him.

Well, that was it for me. I removed his moderator access and told him while I appreciated all he had done that I wouldn't allow him to be hassled by me any more and that I was "temporarily" removing his moderator access.

I'm giving him the chance to decide how he wants to let the community know why he isn't a moderator and that I'd support anything about him stepping down for personal reasons, etc.

Gosh, this stuff is the WORST part of the job running a big forum!

Thanks again to all those who posted their thoughts and support.
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Old 07-20-2009, 12:39 AM
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It sounds like his idea of integrity and truthfulness are somewhat different from yours (or mine for that matter)

He didn't really give you much other option; Which is a shame if he was a good mod on one board.

But I think you've done the right thing. Sounds like his head is somewhat swollen.
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Old 07-20-2009, 12:52 AM
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Ya, not an easy decision... he's basically been the backbone of that other forum (even though it is relatively tiny compared to my other forums).

Honestly, I've got a LOT of mixed feelings right now. On one hand I feel really crummy since I know he's going through a lot of personal / family junk right now and I think the forum is his escape.

On the other hand he seems to have a bit of conspiracy theory issues. In our conversations today he brought up some things that happened in the past and he thought I was working with other moderators and members to trick him and wanted him gone as a moderator. I told him back then that if I really wanted him gone, I'd tell him / do it... I would conspire with other moderators.

I think the long term benefits will outweigh the short term pain. Kinda like pulling out an infected tooth... hurts like the dickens, but is good for the health.
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Old 07-20-2009, 04:39 AM
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Yeah it's never nice having to deal with stuff like that, but you just do what's best for your forum and move on.
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Old 07-20-2009, 06:24 AM
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A bit late here, but I think you made the right decision.

In my experience, moderators that go "bad" tend to stay that way. And even if he had come up with a reasonable explanation and apologized, the chance that he would start doing other problematic things in the future is really high.

It is very painful right now, but if you think it's better for the long-term health of your forum, then it was necessary in my opinion.
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Old 07-20-2009, 02:04 PM
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Agreed! That's our job, right? To take the long term view and not exchange it with short term items.

Fortunately his replies to me today regarding his removal as moderator are just validating my decision and making me feel better about it. Very defensive, saying I never treated him like a friend because I didn't listen to him... The problem here is I always listen to my staff... I just may not always do what they want. In his head, I think doing what he wants is the same as "listening" to him.

I don't have this problem with any other moderators on any of my other forums, so I'm pretty confident in saying it is him and not me in this case.
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